Hating hate, war on war, victory over political enemies, and other malfunctioning approaches

To transform conflict, transformative methods are required. If our primary goal is to gain decisive victory over others, we will quickly resort to destructive methods--demonizing the other, using parliamentary tricks that flout ethical standards, and lying when "necessary." 

As this is written we in the US are finishing the 2024 election season and one side is relying on this method every day. Opponents are called enemies, they are given pejorative nicknames, and the lies are both planned and spontaneous. When fact-checked and proven false, there is no acknowledgement, certainly no apology, I'm constantly reminded of Nixon's deplorable maxim, "Contrition is bullshit." 

While engaging in word battles in the political trenches isn't going to always give us infinite patience or good humor, it remains a polestar aspiration to heed Michele Obama, "When they go low, we go high." 

Or, in the poem[1] from more than a century ago by Edward Markham, 
“He drew a circle that shut me out—

Heretic, a rebel, a thing to flout.

But Love and I had the wit to win:

We drew a circle that took him in!”

(Edwin Markham, 1852-1940)

This contrast in models is evident as well in evolving community organizing. While breakout organizers like Saul Alinsky showed us how to roll up our sleeves, do battle, and win, evolving approaches have given us a gentler paradigm, not meant to skirt tough struggles but to leave the door open a bit to unity, to consensus, and to growing, however slowly, toward Dr. King's Beloved Community. The best workbook on these newer models is one from a school of thought and action called Consensus Organizing (Ohmer & DeMasi, 2009).

From a focus on what works (asset mapping) to developing next-gen youth leadership to rigorous assessment and evaluation, community organizers are far more likely to succeed sustainably by creating the parallel structures based on egalitarian and transformative values and practices. 

Reference

Ohmer, Mary L. & DeMasi, Karen (2009). Consensus organizing: A community development workbook. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage.

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[1] https://hebfdn.org/echoes/outwitted/